Calvsie King of the Calvsie post his incoherent thoughts...

Rock Bottom 1/23/2003 January 23, 2007 - 21:57:34

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I came across this last week but saved it for today. It was written on this day 4 years ago.
To give some reference here a lot of people were confiding things in me and telling me not to tell others, and in the midst of it I felt I had no to turn to. My sister was at odds with my the rest of my family and I was the only one speaking to her, my brother had revealed his true feelings about how he felt on various topics, my parents were telling me nasty things about my sister... I was a 17 year old who was nieve to the world, working at McDonalds and attending the tech for my final year of high school. I was scared and felt so alone.
It was on this day while visiting a close friend from a church my family no longer attended, I broke in front of my younger sister and this friend. Later that day I wrote the following...

Untroubled Blood
Bleed from thine open wound,
Bleed thine Pain and sorrow for days gone by,
Bleed thine life till you can no longer,
But to me cleave not,
Bleed not thine troubles on me.

For I too bleed for such things.
Mine Pain, Mine Sorrow, Mine blood.
For our troubles lie not at the heart.

Bleed not troubles on them.
For they grope for escape from trouble,
They cover IT but the blood seeps through,
They move away from IT but the blood flows towards them
They deny IT exist and drown in it.

For in such I have a lowly dream,
To exist an never look back,
To cast their bodies aside and care not where they land.
I seek to be alone and yet among the flood,
The never ending flood of UNTROUBLED BLOOD...

=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=

Kind of gothy in away... but the story has a mostly happy ending...
My older sister is happily married and back on good terms with the parents,
My parents have stopped being quite so weird (they still are kind of weird though),
My brother's beliefs aren't secret but he's still a jerk,
I went to Florida, finished school, moved out and am doing good... (thanks to the guys at OA I think...)

RGS out...

- calvsie

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