Today I Ponder Life's Little Mysteries :: The Life of the Traegorn

Today I Ponder Life's Little Mysteries
Posted Aug 8, 2006 - 16:03:17	Tweet

Several things have struck my mind lately. The strange contradictions, ironies, and general weirdness I am presented with on a regular basis sometimes baffle my mind. So, perhaps inspired by Full Circle's Lynn, I've made a little list. Recent events may color my statements, but mostly this is stuff that has driven me nuts for years. If you think I'm talking about you... you're probably wrong. Unless I am talking about you - but those people I'm talking about usually don't read this space.

I will warn you though, there is a bit of angst in here today.

1. The person most likely to tell you to "grow up" is likely to be less mature than you are.
It's even more likely if they say so behind your back, and not to your face. I mean, I know - I'm far from grown in many ways - but in others... well, the joke is that I average out to 25, which is where I should be anyway. Here's the thing though - I'm self aware on the subject, and am actually working on it. The people I have an issue with, for reasons defying rational thought, seem to think they're so advanced. Sorry kids, you aren't.

2. Likewise, the person convinced they're smarter than you probably isn't, and the person who IS smarter than you would never say so.
I don't know if this is what things are like for everyone, but I've at least found this to be the case. Every person who has told me they're smarter than me has turned out not to be - or even half of the people in the room. The thing is, I'm often in situations where there is a smarter person around - but they never actually brag about it. This is, I think, because the secure ones know they don't have to brag; meanwhile, the insecure people feel the need to prove themselves at every moment... and usually fall flat.

3. When you don't want a fight, that's when one comes. When you're trying to PICK a fight, is when you'll run into a pacifist.
No, not a physical fight people - I'm rather anti-violence and you know that. And okay, so I'm not actually trying to pick a fight per se, but occasionally (when someone else starts something) I get all hyped up for the "battle"... only to actually succeed in scaring off the person who harassed me... and that just leaves me with a bunch of adrenaline and nowhere to direct it.

4. Winning doesn't always feel like victory.
See point number three.

5. I find everything out eventually...
...and I don't let most people know what I know. Sometimes I don't find out until months later, sometimes years - but I always find out... usually sooner than people think. And you know what? I never forget. I forgive usually... I mean, there have been cases of me holding grudges for years - but even in those cases, I forgave the people. But just because I forgive someone doesn't mean I'll ever trust him or her again.

People only get one shot with that.

6. With an unlimited budget and time, I could make some really kickass stuff.
I have this awesome idea, but lack the money or time to execute the plan. These happen all the time - where I come up with all this stuff (most of which I never say outloud) and never am able to put them together. Not because I don't have the focus - but precisely because I have the focus. I'm still working on the previous plan, so I can't start on the millions of new ones that pop into my mind.

Ah well, I guess I should get some other things done...

- Traegorn