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A Maelstrom of Malaise
Posted July 18, 2007 - 0:37:15

This photo has nothing to do with the postIf you'd have asked me a few days ago how things were going, I would have told you about how fantastic things are. And while those things that were good still are, my answer would likely be different today, and likely even worse in a few days.

There's been a bit of personal chaos in my life lately, and I don't just mean the general dissatisfaction I have with being three and a half hours away from Crysta (and you really don't want me to get started about how that makes me a tad unhappy).

There's a lot of stuff that I can't talk about, as not all parties with a vested interest have necessarily been informed yet and I don't want said people to find out from my website on the off chance they stumbled upon it. Sufficed to say though, very bad stuff is going on with certain people that I care about very much. I cannot go into detail, but it involves my family. If you want more than that, contact me privately via private message or through my e-mail.

I'll be willing to talk about it through those methods.

To add upon the unnamed scenario, my cat Andy has been getting progressively worse over the last few months as his health declines. He's blind, can barely hear, and his kidney's have been shot for years. He can't find the litter box anymore, and he's constantly hungry because his body isn't absorbing the nutrients from the food he is eating. He walks around meowing in a raspy voice constantly because he's lost. Andy is 21 years old and four months, and his organs are slowly shutting down on him. Because of this we've had to make a very tough decision.

On Thursday we're putting him to sleep.

It sucks. I've had this cat since I was five and I love this cat. But he's at the point where he's constantly unhappy, and its only going to keep getting worse. It's been a massive drop off since May too. If you'd asked me when I first moved home whether I thought Andy was doing alright, I would have told you he was great. He was still able to go outside, he was even running around sometimes.

Now he won't stay outside for more than two minutes, has lost most of his vision, and spends his entire day in one spot because he's afraid of getting lost. That's no way to live.

I try not to get melodramatic in this space, I know - but this has been on my mind.

Tomorrow my Uncle Mark, his wife April, their two kids, my Aunt Diane, her husband Greg, and my maternal Grandparents are all coming over for the afternoon and dinner, and then I'm going out with Chris (as it's his last night here) afterwards.

Hopefully all of that will cheer me up.

Bleah.

I should mention the humor that my Uncle and his family live in San Diego, as does Chris - so I'm apparently spending my day and evening with various members of the San Diegan... San Diegoan... San Diegoian... San Diegite... San Diego-something contingent, albeit unrelated to each other.

Life is interesting sometimes.

Sometimes I really wish it wasn't though.
- Traegorn

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It's really rough to lose a cat. My old cat had lost a lot of weight and would throw up almost every day. Everyone except my mom thought she needed to be put down, but my mom couldn't bear it. It was nice to have her for those extra months, but I really don't know how much she enjoyed living them. At least you'll get to be there for the end.
I'm sorry about Andy. I loved that cat.




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